


Release Me

by meliz875



Category: Twilight Series - All Media Types, Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: Angst, Choices, Consensual Infidelity, Drama, F/M, Hopeful Ending, Imprinting, Love Triangles, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-04
Updated: 2013-04-04
Packaged: 2017-12-07 11:43:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/748146
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/meliz875/pseuds/meliz875
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Her soul was bound to one man, while her heart belonged to another. What happens when desire outweighs destiny? When choice threatens to overpower the bond of an imprint?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Release Me

**Author's Note:**

> AN: This was my entry for the Paws & Art 2.0, a banner prompt contest. The banner I chose was of Embry, Bella, and Jacob, with the words 'Everybody Knows' as a tentative title. Congrats to all the winners and I hope you all enjoy this!
> 
> Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

_**Suggested Listening: "A Pound of Flesh" by Radical Face, "Where Do I Even Start" by Morgan Taylor Reid, "Lost" by Aqualung, "Run Away" by Sarah Jarosz, "Broken Crown" by Mumford & Sons** _

* * *

She could hear it all.

Everyone around her moved. Empty plates slid across varnished wood and chairs pushed back. Hands reached for glasses and voices talked over one another. She could _see_ it. A scene she knew by heart, surrounded by a family she'd been part of for years. It was nothing out of the ordinary.

But she was paralyzed. Frozen in place.

She couldn't feel a thing.

Except for _him_. Except for those eyes.

_On her._

Her, and nothing else. Never straying throughout the meal. They found her, just as they settled on her years ago, never really understanding why.

She lifted one leaden hand, spreading each finger before painstakingly placing them over her silverware. Yet, she didn't pick up the fork pressing against her palm. She stood instead, voices filtering back into her ears the moment her feet hit the floor. She reached forward instinctively, claiming her empty plate.

_Move._

_One foot in front of the other._

_Keep walking._

Focusing on the feel of the ceramic beneath her fingertips, she shifted away, turning her back to him. Smiling at the others.

Finally moving away from those eyes.

But they followed.

Like steel to an unforgiving magnet.

She withered under his gaze, knowing what would come. Walking away wasn't enough, because she could feel it starting – a heat blossoming beneath her resolve, forming in her stomach and curling its way deliriously through her veins.

Despite it all, she loved it when he watched her.

It didn't matter how he did. It didn't matter where they were, or how long he let his gaze linger. Every inch of her skin felt his black eyes, the intensity she knew clouded the corners. She could tell when he raked them over her frame, taking in every curve and graceful movement she made. Mapping out paths he already knew.

He followed her everywhere. Every piece of him. Every last bit of his presence.

A rich, sweet scent. Unyielding eyes that robbed her of sense. The feel of rough, copper skin beneath her hands.

_The taste of it against her mouth._

A shudder ripped through her body, and voices again were lost somewhere in the distance.

The heat enveloped her from the inside out.

She lost track of exactly how she made it to the sink, depositing her plate before moving to the refrigerator. Her fingers curled around its door, opening it in one swift movement to retrieve a bottle of water. It was an acceptable ruse to prolong her escape from the table.

But in reality, a better excuse, a subconscious decision to give him an unobstructed view of everything he craved, and everything she wanted to give him.

_Again._

Finally turning, she couldn't stop her gaze when it swept over the table. She couldn't help it as those eyes finally met hers. And again she hesitated, peering back at him carefully. The look of intense reverie – an expression carrying a deep pool of secrets – held her. Captured her. Refused her escape. Drew her in.

The same way it always did.

He sat near the head of the table, to the left of Sam. For one infinite second, she let her stare sweep over his features. His strong, pronounced jaw. His full, bottom lip. _Those eyes._ Onyx orbs that knew everything. A stare that knew _her_.

Feeling the anxious indents made by fingers against plastic, her gaze tipped down, not missing the ghost of a smile that pulled at his lips. She held her breath, studying the aging floorboards beneath her feet until his eyes faltered.

Allowing both her sense and her hearing to return.

"Bella?"

Looking up, she blinked wildly, a familiar voice clearing the oblique haze from both her mind and vision. She met _another_ stare. Eyes connecting with the man to whom she belonged. To the soul that owned her.

Not the eyes that watched her.

Jacob Black smiled, one brow rising curiously over his eye. "You okay, Bells? Thought we lost you there for a minute."

Blinking again, she let her face dip toward the floor, heart hammering against her ribs. Closing her eyes, she drew in a slow, purging breath. Hoping like hell it would hide the crimson burn in her cheeks.

Better yet, praying the moment would help mask the shame in her eyes.

She looked up, lashes fluttering as she returned Jacob's smile, doing her best to appease his quiet concerns, while his gaze did its best to soothe her.

"Sorry," she apologized quietly, her voice nearly lost among the din of the others. "Daydreaming."

Jacob chuckled and she kept her mahogany eyes trained on him, even though she could feel it again.

A glance toward her from the other side of the table.

The heat within lulled to a simmer, but it was still there, no matter how she tried to smother it. She swore silently to herself. It was always like this. This desire – this natural, human _need_ – churning just below the surface. Scratching at her insides, begging to be turned loose. Longing to be seen. A nagging she could never quite ignore.

But she pushed it down anyway, trying to extinguish the burn by focusing on the palliative comfort of Jacob's presence in front of her. He was her balance, her steady ground.

It was always him that pulled her back. To this life. To this family that needed her.

One sweep of her eyes revealed the others gathered around the dinner table. Sam Uley's steady presence at the head, with Jacob to his right. Her eyes passed over her empty chair, catching Quil Ateara's toothy grin as he reached out and punched Seth Clearwater in the arm. Emily's chair was also empty, but Bella could hear her movements as she floated effortlessly around the kitchen, already focused on cleaning up the mess left in dinner's wake. Leah Clearwater sat on the opposite side of the table, leaning into Paul Lahote as she whispered something to him, a joke or comment meant only for their ears.

_And him._

Bella's mouth dried, and she could feel her heart pumping frantically. She was slipping, drowning in eyes that swept away tradition. Losing herself in a gentle presence that had a way of making her forget about duty.

She could also tell when he noticed. His tense jaw and the creases of concern on his forehead were always too much, bleeding with a regard he wasn't supposed to show.

_It always happened when she looked too long._

So she did what she always did. She pulled back, because she had to.

Because she had no other choice.

Returning her eyes to Jacob, she ignored the vicious ache in her chest, offering him another easy, friendly smile. On the outside, she was steady. Confident, even if the same could never be said for what consistently boiled just below her skin.

She took a couple steps, feet heavy, arm lifting from her side until her hand came to a rest on Jacob's shoulder. He watched her. His eyes followed her too, and the intensity behind them conveyed the same love, the same passion as the pair across the table.

But her heart didn't pound. Her fingers didn't tremble.

Instead, she felt nothing except the subtle warmth of friendship. A mutual respect and a simple, unexciting love for someone who had always been important to her. A man who needed her the same way she once needed him.

For survival.

Because she was Jacob's imprint, and he was her best friend.

Nothing less.

_Nothing more._

And standing before him, even now, with their inherent connection flickering through the far corners of her being, it wasn't his name running through her mind. It wasn't his presence overpowering her senses. It wasn't his body she wished was beneath her hands.

And those thoughts were what triggered robotic reminders. Reminders she had to keep up this facade.

Bending at the waist as Jacob's head tipped back, her lips met his in a soft, effortless kiss. He smiled against her mouth, and her fingers curled into his shoulder.

Still, she felt nothing except the ache in her chest and the burning sting deep in the corners of her eyes.

And _those eyes_ from across the table, because moments like these were when she swore she could feel him burning holes straight through her body.

And in that instant, it _was_ too much.

Bella pulled away first, giving Jacob's shoulder an affectionate squeeze before placing the water bottle on the table and letting her arms drop to her sides, hands balling into tense fists. "I'm gonna run to the bathroom...get cleaned up a bit."

Jacob nodded as she straightened, his gaze lingering for a moment. "We're probably going to head down to the beach for the bonfire in a minute or two. Want us to wait for you?"

She shook her head. She needed a minute. A minute to clear her head so she could keep going. So she could make it through this night and remember why she needed to.

It was a continuous process, one she knew by heart.

Bella took a step back from his chair. "No, that's okay. I'll catch up."

Jacob's head bobbed once more in acknowledgment before turning in his chair, facing the table as conversation steadily flowed between the its occupants. Nobody questioned it when she fled from the stifling room, a weight bearing down on her in the absence of others, the pressure of it simultaneously crushing and freeing her with each step she took.

Bella held her breath until she reached the bathroom, almost stumbling across the threshold before throwing her body against the door. It clicked shut the same time her breath escaped. Each subsequent inhale and exhale left her lungs in quick, forced breaths. She tried holding one or two in, tried getting a handle on the emotions fighting desperately to crawl their way to the surface.

But even as she managed to push herself away from the door, reaching the sink, she knew it was going to take longer this time.

She was losing it. Losing her head. Losing control.

It was getting worse. It was getting harder. Harder to smile. Harder to pretend. Harder to resist. Harder to walk away. The breaking point she'd been hurtling toward for far too long was suddenly within reach.

Damn it, how did she let it get this far?

Bella's cheeks blazed as she closed her eyes, hands gripping the sink's laminate surface. She ignored the churning in her stomach, but wondered anyway, entirely too aware of this feeling – this _desire_ – surging through her veins. How did the others ignore it? How did they not know when she felt it so wholly? When it consumed her? How did they not see it?

What he did to her.

What they had always been to each other.

What they _still_ were to each other.

_Embry..._

His name echoed in her mind, wrapping itself around her aching heart. Heightening her senses. Gutting her, yet igniting an unquenchable fire all in a single breath.

He had been her choice. One made long ago by two people who still had one. Before the imprint.

Back when love was enough.

God, there were days she wished she could go back. Back to the beginning. Back to the time her strength meant nothing to anyone but herself. Back to the days when she was only responsible for one heart – her own, the one abandoned by a love that left her, taken away by a boy she could now barely remember.

What happened between her and Embry in the beginning was unexpected. There was no better word for it. She met him one day in Jacob's garage – after Edward left – and at first she barely gave him a second glance.

But when she came back the next day, he was there too. Despite the fact Bella could always feel a certain care and adoration in the eyes of her best friend – one that crossed a platonic line she drew from the start – Jacob never questioned the presence of his childhood friend whose quiet personality balanced Jacob's more jovial, blatant attempts to bring Bella back from the dead.

She found as much solace in Embry's silence as she did in the comfort of Jacob's voice, in his attempts to lure her from the shell of sadness surrounding her heart. While Jacob had his hands buried in the guts of his latest automotive project, Embry would sit a few feet from her, silently doing his homework. Every now and then he would stop, peer at her out of the corner of his eye and smile, just before asking her a question about what he was working on.

Embry's unassuming presence became as much of a fixture in her life as Jacob's loud guffaws and merciless teasing. Through the easy exchanges she and Embry shared, ones between two people meeting each other for the first time – ignoring broken pieces and ghosts from the past – she learned she had a lot in common with Embry Call. Flaky mothers, a love of non-fiction books, an appreciation for bands Jacob had never heard of nor cared to listen to. He was intriguing. Like Jacob, but completely different. Jacob was an open book who wore his heart on his sleeve, while Embry was a bit of a mystery. A boy carrying a wisdom and maturity beyond his years, and a mesmerizing intensity behind those ebony eyes.

The more time passed, the more Bella found herself wanting to learn everything she could about him.

Yet the first time he asked her to do something as more than friends, Bella hesitated, remembering what it was – _who_ it was – that led her to La Push in the first place. She knew Embry well enough to know he deserved someone more beautiful – someone more whole – than her.

And she was so used to people trying to fix her, she assured herself and him she could see right through it.

So she refused, reminding him she didn't need another set of hands trying to piece the shattered bits of herself back together.

_Even though he'd never really tried to fix her..._

His smile had surprised her, and she could only watch him, her hands trembling as he took a step forward. The roughness of his palms suddenly were against her cheeks, and those eyes pierced through every bit of crumbling resolve.

" _I_ do _think you're beautiful, Bella," he finally whispered to her. "All of you – even the broken pieces, and that's what I want."_

She loved him more than she ever thought possible. It wasn't the same kind of love she'd felt before. It didn't crash in. It didn't knock her to the ground and leave her reeling in disbelief. It started small. A tiny ball of fire buried deep within her, kindled by his unwavering patience and steady, unassuming presence. It was fueled by her desire to know him better. The flames grew, licking at her insides each time he smiled, and fire swallowed her whole whenever he pressed his lips against hers. The world around her faded as his mouth tasted her. His heat allowed her to forget everything that came before him and everything that was sure to come after.

She was happy in a way she never imagined.

It was consuming, in every way love should be.

But it wasn't long before it was taken away, before their lives all took a turn, when Embry suddenly was nowhere to be found.

She hadn't known why at the time. She didn't understand why he wouldn't return her calls, why he was never home when she stopped there. Jacob did his best to reassure her, promising her he'd come around, but even she didn't miss the uncertainty in his eyes...the questions.

Then Jacob disappeared too.

None of it made sense. It nearly broke her all over again until Jacob was the one to bend the rules. One night, Bella heard a tapping on her window. Brushing away stale tears from her cheeks, she moved from her bed to open it when she caught a glimpse of his features waiting in the tree just outside.

He had slipped through the window effortlessly, and Bella took a step back, giving him room. His frame straightened and in a split second, his eyes met hers.

_Everything changed._

Every day leading up to that moment, every mistake, every choice tumbled away as Bella felt the subtle shift of the earth beneath her feet. And Jacob's eyes – the wide, dazed stare focused only on her as his mouth fell slightly open – were the only thing anchoring her to the ground.

When Bella blinked, she felt the difference. She could tell things would never be the same.

But she didn't forget.

In the moments following, Jacob had tried to stammer out some sort of explanation. _Wolves...shapeshifters...Taha Aki..._ To be honest, she didn't catch much of it. She did, however, hear Embry's name in the middle of his rushed words. Her heart stuttered, but it fell silent when Jacob finally managed to push out what he had been trying to tell her all along.

" _I think I just imprinted on you, Bells..."_

Imprint.

It meant nothing to her then, but the moment it was defined was still a vivid memory in her mind, a scene etched into the shell of a heart that wanted so much more than fate decided to hand her...

_She barely remembered Jacob leading her downstairs and into her truck. He drove, somehow shattering the speed limit in her ancient vehicle in order to get to his house. When they arrived, everyone was waiting. They felt it, Jacob told her later. His father, Sam Uley, a group of boys she didn't know, all scattered on the home's modest front porch._

_Leaning against the outside of the house was Embry. He was different, bigger. He looked older._

_But those eyes – lifting, immediately finding her – were exactly the same._

_Her heart stopped beating again. A part of her wanted to run to him, hold him, kiss him. She wanted to scold him for making her worry, but she couldn't move. Her feet involuntarily stayed the course as Jacob led her into the house, but Embry's gaze refused to let her go. His eyes cried out for her, yet there was a searing resignation in them, a painful knowledge she didn't recognize._

_Then he was gone. An aging, wooden door separating the parts of her she could already feel splitting in two._

_She found herself in front of Billy Black, swallowing thickly as her gaze pushed back against his wise but soft stare._

_Fifteen minutes passed while Billy reiterated the stuttered words Jacob had tried to speak, eloquently explaining the tribe's history, and how a select few had a gene that allowed them to transform into supernatural creatures – shapeshifters, werewolves – that protected the tribe._

_When he reached the part about imprinting, he kept it simple. He explained it as Jacob's wolf recognizing its perfect counterpart in another. That it was an unbreakable bond, and for the rest of her life, Jacob would be by her side. As a friend, a brother._

_A lover..._

_The emphasis Billy put on the final word crawled up Bella's spine, and she could feel Jacob's encroaching presence just behind her. She never had a problem being close to him, but in that moment, he was too close._

_Her eyes shut, even as Billy continued talking. Puzzle pieces fell into place and the more he explained, the more Bella knew what it meant. She knew what was supposed to happen, but when he fell silent, she asked. Still, she let the words fumble from her lips, because she needed to hear him say it._

_It wasn't real unless he said it out loud. He had to answer her question, or she would keep pretending she could keep the life – and the person – waiting for her on the front porch._

" _And what if I don't choose it? What if I don't accept it?"_

_Billy considered this for a moment – the possibility of a choice. That everyone would come out unscathed should she choose to ignore the imprint. She could see it in the way the lines on his forehead deepened with thought, in the way his Adam's apple bobbed as he bought himself an extra moment._

_But in the end, he released a breath, along with the truth she knew all along._

" _Should you choose not to accept it, Bella, Jacob's soul will never be whole. It will be like he's missing a part of himself, and if that happens, he'll never be the leader he was meant to be. He'll be incomplete. Without you, the pack will be incomplete..._ "

Bella's head jerked at the recollection. She shook it, the conversation that took place nearly two years ago seared into her mind with as much clarity as the day it happened. Intertwined with the vivid memory were more pointed words, additional explanations given by the Quileute elders despite the fact she never asked for them. But they had an obligation to make Bella completely aware of her role, and to know the place she was meant to hold in Jacob's life.

_You belong to Jacob, Bella._

Their succinct voices echoed through her mind, even when all she could think of was _another_ pair of onyx eyes.

 _Especially_ then.

_You are Jacob's mate._

_A union that will bring balance to the pack. To this tribe._

_Great honor. Great responsibility._

_Should you choose to accept it._

_Choose..._

She hated the word now. Hated it because she _never_ felt like she had choice, even if she once thought she did. Before she could fully grasp what it meant, the pressure was placed exactly where it needed to be. Her duty, her obligation and the consequences of denying what the spirits aligned were meticulously taken out and put on display for her to see. To accept, and to know what would happen if she did not.

There was a choice.

But only one of them was right.

Three days after the imprint, she found herself outside Embry's door. Knowing every last detail of the pack's secret, she was told she could see him again, but the permission left a bitter taste in her mouth.

Jacob had given her space, a moment she desperately needed, and no matter how much it shredded her insides, her path led her to Embry. To face what she was giving up. To do what she thought was the right thing.

To say goodbye...

_Hands clenched into fists at her sides, she tried to will away the tightness in her chest. But by the time she heard footsteps, breathing was futile._

_He stepped out to his front porch before she could go in, and Bella kept her eyes focused on the boards beneath her feet. It was all she could do not to look at him, but it didn't matter. She could feel those eyes on her anyway._

_But somewhere deep down, she swallowed past the obstruction in her throat and dredged up enough courage to tear her gaze from her feet, bringing her eyes to meet the only pair that knew her better than she knew herself._

_And she realized she didn't need to speak._

_She watched the breath leave him, responding to the anguish in her eyes. His darted from side to side, for the first time looking everywhere but her. But still, those eyes were all she could focus on. They were betrayed. Gutted. The color in them completely gone, replaced by an emptiness she could barely fathom._

_She didn't need to say the words._

_He already knew why she was there._

" _You chose the imprint..."_

_With his words, something inside her imploded._

_The word burned like acid on her tongue._ Imprint _. She could suddenly feel everything. It was all on display for her to see. Every change the word meant for her life. Both of them. The life she was meant for and the one standing in front of her. What she was gaining and everything she was leaving behind._

_While one part of her yearned to leave, the other ached to stay._

_Something she had a feeling would never go away._

_But she found her feet moving forward anyway, refusing to let her head catch up. In that moment, there was no imprint. There was just her, and there was just Embry. Her hands lifted from her sides, toward him, and the noise he made just before he stepped back – a sharp, surprised intake of breath – stabbed at her already pounding heart._

_It didn't matter. He had to know how much it was going to shatter her to walk away from the only person she ever loved the way she was meant to._

_By the time her fingers reached him, seeking out the rough skin just above his jaw, he gave in. But beneath her hands, he was shaking. A visceral, natural reaction to her proximity, brought on by knowing it could be the last time he held her. The last time he touched her._

_And she trembled as well, because it was the same for her. The tangible proof of what she was about to lose was standing directly in front of her._

_She'd never felt so empty._

_She closed the distance between their bodies, unforgivingly pulling him toward her. She wanted to fill that space. He didn't resist, and when she could finally feel his breath on her face, she pressed her forehead hard against his. She inhaled through her nostrils, slow and steady. Remembering his scent for later, when the emptiness was sure to return and her resolve was sure to weaken. For those moments she knew fate would win out._

_The same way it had._

_The same way it still was in that moment._

_Her fingers clasped at his skin, cataloging the heat, the way his muscles stiffened under her hands. Her nose brushed against his, and the noise he made in the back of his throat gave birth to a shudder as it crawled its way up her spine, the first searing tear leaving a wet trail down her cheek._

" _Stay."_

_Her lips parted, both her legs and her determination weakening beneath the sheer force of the only word he could offer her._

_It took several moments for her to form the response in her mouth. "I can't," she finally whispered, her voice cracking beneath the difficulty of it. Her palms wrapped around the flesh where his neck and shoulder met. "You_ know _I can't, Embry. Jacob, the pack..."_

" _Bella...please." Her eyes were still closed, but she could feel his lips move against her forehead. "I don't care what they say. You don't have to do this. You can fight it." His voice rose, the urgency in it growing with his plea. "If you don't fight it for me, fight it for you. This is our life, not yours."_

_A scratching heat screamed in her throat, willing her to believe the possibility of his words._

_Could she fight it? Could she still have a choice? Could she still have this?_

A union that will bring balance to the pack. To this tribe.

Great honor. Great responsibility.

_Stronger words overshadowed his._

_Her head shook before she realized it was moving. "I have no choice, Embry..."_

_His hands moved quickly, and her eyes opened when he took a step back, just far enough to peer down at her with a dark, determined gaze. His fingers tangled into her hair and she gripped his shirt, wanting him closer. Silently pleading with him not to pull away yet._

" _There's_ always _a choice, Bella."_

_He whispered it to her, quietly yet forcefully. Questioning everything his tribe, his brothers, and his elders told her. Her mouth fell open, and she frantically blinked back tears. She could feel the words rooting inside her, just out of reach. Where she'd never be able to rid herself of them._

_She couldn't speak. Something inside her couldn't refute what he said, because she could feel his presence inside her. Still. Somewhere just next to the imprint. Next to her affection for Jacob. It was just as dominant. The push she felt to walk into Embry's arms and never leave was just as strong as the force pulling her away from them._

_If not stronger._

_But it didn't matter. The decision was made. This was bigger than herself, and she'd tell herself that every single day if she had to._

_So instead of arguing – instead of agreeing – Bella rose on her tiptoes, pulling Embry to her. His body bent willingly under her pressure, and his mouth swept away any reply she may have given, her lips moving desperately against his. She ignored the searing behind her eyelids, the throbbing in her chest. Instead, she focused on the taste of Embry's breath, the way his hand dug into her hip, and the silky feel of his hair between her fingers._

_This was it. There would be nothing like this after._

_He pulled away first, just barely, long before she was ready. She held him where he was. In her arms, pressed against her body. Wanting him to know if everything had been different, if life wasn't filled with inexplicable magic, she belonged there. With him._

" _If love was enough," she murmured, lips ghosting across his. Warm breath mixed with hers, and she tried to lock it away. The feel of it. The memory of him. For days she knew it would be much harder than this._

" _If it was enough...I would stay. It would be you..."_

Love had not been enough.

She barely remembered leaving Embry's house. She didn't go home; instead, she allowed herself to be pulled to the reason she walked away from him in the first place.

Jacob.

She stood in his living room and one look was all he needed. What happened was written all over her face. Her pain was his, and he didn't speak. Instead, he opened his arms to her and she walked into them. Allowing herself to be swallowed in the comforting warmth, refusing to protest as sobs finally left her body and his large hand cupped the back of her head. Holding her to him. Being exactly what she needed in that moment.

Her best friend.

And for that, she was grateful. Once her cries ebbed, a part of her was thankful because despite everything, at least it was him.

Bella finally opened her eyes, met by her reflection in the bathroom mirror. It stared back at her, unmoving. She remembered Jacob's strength, his patience as the months passed. He never pushed, but Bella eventually gave in, knowing she needed to take her place. The one she had been steered toward.

But Embry's words never went away.

Days turned into months, but they were always there, on the edges of every thought. At first, they were a whisper, brought on by a warmth she should have felt when Jacob kissed her. By Embry's blazing eyes catching hers for an all too-brief moment.

She yearned for that fire. Searched for it in Jacob's eyes, but the more she chased it, the more it eluded her.

The words grew louder. Glances turned into gazes. Excuses were made for hands to linger, for bodies to be in the same room. For stolen moments when no one was around and it was just her and it was just him, smiling at one another like they used to.

And she _burned_.

The words screamed.

_There's always a choice, Bella._

Bella's eyes fluttered closed, lashes ghosting across her cheeks as the memories faded from behind her eyelids. She reminded herself to breathe, but somehow couldn't miss the soft sound of the bathroom door opening. Of a heavy body pushing it closed.

Of a lock sliding into place.

A muted squeak left her throat the same time she welcomed a pair of warm hands on her waist. Her body fell slack as she was lifted effortlessly, her feet leaving the ground and her frame twisting, until she felt the cool wood of the door against her back. Until she felt the heat of a body pushing against her chest. Eyes still closed, her hands raised, fingers seeking out the fire she craved. The face she knew by heart, the scent that drove the heady rush of blood through her veins, the same time the mouth she needed desperately found hers.

She shuddered instinctively as he pushed himself against her, closing the inevitable distance between them. Bringing himself impossibly closer.

She squeezed her eyes shut, refusing to open them. Her hands traveled up his arms, mapping paths across his biceps, fingers curling needfully into his skin, grasping the flesh at the base of his neck. Exploring. Memorizing. Curling into the ends of his hair, pulling him in. Refusing to let go. Unwilling to surrender this stolen moment.

Because moments were all they had.

Moments were all they _ever_ had.

Because this wasn't the first.

And no matter what she told herself, Bella also knew it wouldn't be the last.

Which is why she eventually opened her eyes, reminding herself how important it was to soak in every facet of him. To tuck away this small piece he could give her in this moment until the next one came along.

She needed to see him.

She needed to remember why they were risking everything for this.

Why they were risking everything for a choice.

Why they were risking everything for just one more moment with each other.

He pulled away the same time she opened her eyes, pants of breath washing over her lips as she clasped his face between her hands. Bella tipped her head, finally able to see his eyes, clouded with a need that no doubt resembled her own.

Reflecting what she never left behind. The choice she never let go. The life she still wanted.

A fire she needed.

He didn't wait for her to speak, urgency taking over as he leaned forward, peppering hurried, warm kisses just below her ear, the skin of her neck, the curve of her shoulder. Bella let her head fall back against the door, lips parting as she hung on to him for dear life.

"Embry..." His name fell from her lips, the word laced with both desire and a desperate plea.

"We don't have much time," he murmured against her flesh, his hands curling around her shoulders, holding her in place.

Bella grimaced into his hair, fingernails leaving crescent moons on his biceps. Something about the reminder grated at her insides, in a way she was usually able to ignore. "We _never_ have much time," she replied, gasping as Embry's hand fell, seeking out pale flesh as steady fingers lowered to the button of her jeans.

But he didn't want to talk. Talking never helped. Shedding light on what they were doing never happened. His face moved, a low growl rumbling in his throat the same time his mouth covered hers. She groaned softly, her body instinctively responding to his encouragement. Shivering beneath his hands, nipping at his bottom lip the same time she heard her zipper being lowered.

"Embry," she repeated, mumbling his name against his lips, inexplicably bracing her hands on his shoulders. Her heart raced, knowing the others were still much too close, even if they were no longer in the house. She heard the growl again, and this time she pushed. " _Embry_..."

Suddenly, the heat of his touch disappeared from her body and his lips were no longer on hers. By the time she opened her eyes, Embry had both hands placed on the door, one on either side of her, leaning against them. He was studying her, eyes troubled and tortured.

She couldn't remember the last time she saw them any other way.

It was no use. Just as sure as it would happen again, this time would end like many of the others. Need and desire – a choice now laced with shame – would fall victim to duty and guilt. In that moment, the consequences were too apparent, too heavy.

And Bella couldn't help feeling she wasn't the only one who knew it was becoming too much. That it might be too hard to go on like they were.

Blinking wildly, Bella's face screwed up as she tried to contain the hopelessness pooling in her chest.

Embry closed his eyes, saving them both, breath still leaving him in labored exhales. He took a tentative step forward, leaning down and pressing his forehead against hers. She took his face between her hands once again, breathing him in.

"What do you want, Bella?"

The words carried more weight than they usually did, and a shiver erupted from her stomach, spreading rapidly to her fingers.

She let his weight pin her against the door. "You _know_ what I want...but you also know it's impossible..."

The last words were sharp on her tongue, no longer holding the blunt weight and truth they used to. At one time, she believed them.

Embry, however, never did.

Pulling back, his gaze traveling across her face, mapping her features. He pursed his lips, jaw tense, before reaching up and tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. A jarring clarity washed over his ebony eyes. "We can't keep doing this..."

Bella's stomach jerked violently, and for a moment, her legs quivered beneath her. She knew what he meant – the largest part of her felt the same way – but her hands dug into his arms anyway, as if her feeble human strength could keep him there.

Embry's lips pulled down as he fought a frown. "Tell me what I'm supposed to do, Bella. This?" He jerked his head away from her, scanning the small room they were in. "Sneaking into bathrooms? The shower? So he doesn't smell me on you?" The fire in his eyes was back, laced with a growing frustration. "This is what we've turned into, and I can't keep doing it. To us, to the pack..."

Each word hit Bella with a force she was used to, a self-admonishment she could never shake. Embry was right. Their self-centered, yet all too-human weakness for one another – to hang on to what they lost – was, in a single breath, both right and wrong.

"I know..." Bella whispered, unable to stop a tear from escaping the corner of her eye.

Embry's features softened, his eyebrows knit together in sincerity as his hand cupped her cheek. "I know you do...and we're more than this. More than a backseat to some fucking magic that comes along with this messed up life." His voice was edged with bitterness as he motioned to himself. "Everybody knows that...it's not just us."

It was Bella's turn to step forward, her fingers clutching Embry's shirt, closing the small distance between them as she rested her forehead on his chest. She closed her eyes and although it took a moment, she eventually felt Embry wrap his arms around her, holding her to him. She could feel his nose in her hair.

"I don't know how to give you up..." Bella's lips brushed against his t-shirt, her tears soaking through the thin material.

Embry's heart thumped wildly beneath her hands, and she could feel him take a deep, ragged breath. "So don't..." he finally whispered, the words almost lost in the air surrounding them.

Bella's chest tightened, because it all felt familiar, like a scene she'd lived through before.

And she knew how it ended the first time.

"But the pack, the tribe...Jacob..." The rehearsed response felt too forced. Too foreign on her tongue. Keeping her eyes closed, she fumbled more than ever to hold on to the resolve that got her through the past years.

Embry's sigh was heavy. "You think he doesn't know?"

The simple admission was enough to make Bella shudder beneath his hands, her body pulling back slightly, enough to tip her head and look at Embry. He was peering down at her with knowing, liquid eyes.

Bella's lips parted, and Embry pulled his gaze away, focusing on the door behind her. "He knows you're not happy. He feels it... _we_ feel it because he does. And..." He paused, swallowing before finally lowering his gaze back to hers. "...there's a shift. In his mind, in the way his thoughts run, in the way he speaks to us...to _me_. Every time...after we're together, when you _are_ happy...he feels that too."

Bella suddenly found it difficult to breathe, her stomach rolling and churning beneath the possibility intertwined in Embry's words. She dropped her eyes, swiping the tears from them with the back of her hand.

"If he knows..." she choked out, "why hasn't he ever said anything?"

Embry's fingers were back on her face, running across her jawline, her neck, her shoulders. Still, he didn't answer, even when Bella frowned, none of it making sense as she felt her head shake back and forth.

Finally, he spoke, disrupting the contemplative, heavy silence. "We can't keep doing this, Bella..." Embry repeated, his words drifting for a moment, like he was keeping something from her. Like he was willing her to fill in the blanks.

She tilted her head, and Embry met her movement, his lips pressing to hers gently. She held her breath, allowing him to linger, to take his time. Something they were never able to do.

Heat still coursed through her veins when he pulled away, holding her in place, watching her carefully. "We can start over," he whispered. "Somewhere none of this exists. Where it's just us, you and me...like it was supposed to be."

Bella blinked at him in disbelief, unable to ignore the fact her stomach fluttered wildly at the possibility. "How?" she stuttered.

"I've been saving," he answered swiftly, throwing a glance over his shoulder before returning those eyes to her.

"Embry..."

He didn't let her finish.

"You _still_ have a choice, Bella."

She reeled, trying to process his words as he wrapped his arms around her again, whispering "midnight" into her hair, over and over, like it was their salvation.

Bella buried her face in Embry's chest. He tightened his hold on her, and they stood there, wrapped in each other. Bella reminded herself to breathe, recycling Embry's words, resurrecting a choice she thought she didn't have. Remembering the love she thought she could _no longer_ have. Bringing both lives forward all over again.

She loved Jacob. He had been more than she deserved and the connection shared between their souls was undeniable.

But Bella – her heart, her body, the _woman_ she was – needed the man in front of her.

The realization ebbed the ache in her chest, loosening the bonds on her soul. Not all the way, but just enough. Enough to make her wonder, and enough to see the choice had never been clearer.

* * *

Later that night, Jacob let himself through the front door of the small home he shared with Bella.

It only took a moment to figure out something was not right.

But he already knew.

He knew because it started long before.

A molten weight formed in his stomach the moment Bella placed a hand on his knee at the bonfire. He looked at her, the firelight flickering in her mahogany eyes, and she smiled at him. It was a soft gesture. Reserved, but thankful.

She leaned forward, placing a gentle kiss on his cheek. As she went to lean back, Jacob lifted his hand, catching her cheek in his palm. She blinked, frozen in place by the intense, wondering look in his eyes.

"You make me happy, Bella," he whispered, the corners of his lips curling into a small smile.

Bella returned it, placing her hand over his. She didn't take it, and she didn't lean into it, but she allowed it.

He never lied to himself. He never asked her for more. He never let himself believe it wasn't another hand she wished for.

"And you know I want you to be happy too, right?"

Bella's eyes fell slightly, hesitating before they recaptured his. "I know, Jake," she murmured.

He smiled at her then, lowering his hand but not before he wrapped his fingers around hers. He knew others could probably hear his words, but he didn't care. He reached out with his free hand, taking her chin between his thumb and forefinger.

"So you know that no matter what, that's the most important thing to me, right?" he pressed on. "I never wanted you to get mixed up in this life. That when it comes to this imprint thing, so long as you're happy, that's all that matters. No matter what it takes. That's enough for me."

Bella blinked, letting his words register. Several moments passed before her shoulders rose and fell with a heavy breath, and she nodded. Before he could see anything else in those piercing brown eyes, he released her hand, turning to face the fire. He could feel her watching him long after, taking what she wanted from his words.

It didn't matter what it was.

This time, it was her choice.

The flames in the bonfire were low, licking over charred, smoldering logs, when everyone stood and gathered blankets and chairs, preparing to head home. Bella caught his hand, and Jacob squeezed her fingers.

"I'm gonna go for a run," he told her. "I'll be home in a couple hours."

She lingered for a few seconds, giving him another affectionate smile.

"Love you, Jake."

"Love you too, Bells."

One glance at the clock above the sink revealed it was almost a quarter past midnight. The silence was thick in the house as Jacob moved into the living room, locating the light switch on the wall. Her sweet, intoxicating scent – a mix of apricots, cream, and the sweetest honey – still clung to every surface in the small home, greeting him. Jacob took a deep breath through his nostrils, drawing in the aroma.

Filling the inherent emptiness he already felt. Replacing the silence that screamed in his ears.

He noticed the coffee table first. The book she was reading, left facedown to mark her page, was no longer there. Nothing else seemed out of place, but he turned anyway, peering back into the kitchen. The coat rack. Her dark blue jacket.

Also missing.

With a sigh, Jacob turned back to the living room, knowing time had finally caught up to them. His heart throbbed in his chest, but another feeling washed over him. One he couldn't quite place as he sank to the sofa, elbows digging into his knees as he brought both fists to his mouth.

The only thing he could liken it to was relief.

Because he too was sick of fighting. Of pretending.

Because fate was a funny thing. Something that couldn't be decided by spirits or a beast that lived inside him.

Because humans, by nature, held something more powerful. The ability to disrupt fate.

The ability to leave and be left. The ability to choose.

Jacob lowered his eyes to the coffee table, sweeping over its contents until he felt his gaze drawn to a piece of paper. Folded neatly, it rested in the center, between the remote and a magazine. The bright white of it was blinding, a stark contrast to the dark ink used to write his name across its surface.

But Jacob didn't reach out. Instead, he smiled against his knuckles, his lips parting slightly before he whispered into his flesh.

" _I release you."_

Three words. Validating her choice. Surrendering to its strength.

Setting her free.

* * *

_Reviews are always appreciated. :)_


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